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Harringay, Haringey - So Good they Spelt it Twice!

Hi all,

This post is not meant to be judgemental, but I do feel like I need a better way to cope with what's been happening. 

Several times a day, a pair of men escort their mentally disabled family member through the passageway, stopping and resting on certain streets. He vocalises very loudly, and it is disturbing. It makes the clausterphobic situation of being in lockdown feel even more stressful. 

On their side, I'm sure these daily walks are their respite from being cooped up in the house with the same behaviour. 

Is anyone else dealing with this same issue? How are you coping?

Thanks

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I know the group you mean, though I don't think I can ever hear them from my flat. It's probably really important for him to get out and about a few times a day - and his family/carers are of course just looking out for him and trying to improve his daily life. Four months of lockdown is tough though, and can be very anxiety making. Would it help if you played music or perhaps used earplugs? The guy can't help it, after all...

Thank you both. I appreciate the perspective and context. 

I was about to post exactly the same thing. He used to regularly sit very near our house for a long time and as I have worked from home for a long while now I did find it very disruptive and disturbing, not the least because he's very loud. 

Then I used to see him in Ducketts Common and now he's back along the Passage.

I have every sympathy as everyone here so far has expressed, and my concern is actually more about whether he is receiving the appropriate support he needs. I can't even imagine how his family and carers cope during this very strange time. 

I have been reticent about making an approach though... 

Hi , we live right on the passage so I do know who you mean and like you I have probably only begun to notice him because of working from home. I think he is a young adult with learning difficulties. I suspect that he is autistic but I must confess I have not really had a proper look to see if he is distressed. I have worked with people with learning difficulties and I know what it is like to be stared at when you are trying to support someone who is having difficulties, so that does make me a bit shy of doing that.  I think that the things he is doing , like sitting in the same place for a while , taking his top off and vocalising quite loudly are perhaps his way of regulating his emotions. If he does get louder it could be a sign that he is getting more  distressed and I will certainly take a more active role in checking on that. At the same time I would only do that very carefully. If he does always have two people with him , I suspect that is because he needs them both. I suspect that , generally , when he does sit down and make these noises the people with him are probably desperately trying to encourage him to get up and move on and probably trying to calm him or help him calm himself down. 

I guess the thing to do is to ask why you find it distressing. If you think it’s because you worry he is upset, etc. Check in, sounds like he is getting cared for. Yes disabled people can make loud noises that our different to what we are used to,especially in our conservative world. . I would see the sounds as this persons way of communicating

I also live right on the passage on one of the streets that they take a rest break at and, as I have been recently fixing my car, have been often outside when they pass by. 

I agree with Tigha, the gentleman's vocalising is just his way of communicating and, although I'm not an expert, he doesn't seem at all distressed to me most of the time. They often sit quite happily for 5-10 min having a rest and and his carers have a chat before they all move on. He occasionally gets agitated, but hey who doesn't. It doesn't bother me (or my family) at all and it's just become another part of our new every life to hear him as they pass by. 

I think of it as a positive thing that they get this exercise and outdoor well-being time everyday and in my humble opinion, I think his two carers do a fantastic job and should be applauded for the way they support him.

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